The four wives

Renee Lehman

(5/2018) A few weeks ago, I came upon this very old, inspiring short story. It originates from the sacred land of Tibet. I don’t know who wrote it, but one thing is certain, its message is profound.

The Man with Four Wives

Long, long ago when the world was young and the tiger walked with the deer, there was a rich king who had four wives. The king loved his fourth wife the most and adorned her with riches.

He also loved his third wife and was always showing her off to neighboring kingdoms. However, he always feared that she would leave him. His second wife was kind and considerate and his trusted confidant and advisor in difficult times. Wife number one was devoted and loyal and although she loved him deeply, he was not as interested and tended to ignore her.

One day, the king fell ill and the truth dawned that his life was soon to end. He thought of the luxurious life he had led and feared being alone when he died. He asked his fourth wife, "I have loved you the most, endowed you with the finest clothing, showered gifts upon you and taken great care over you. Now that I’m dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No way!" she replied and walked away without another word.

The sad king then asked the third wife, "I have loved you all my life. Now that I’m dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No!" she replied. "Life is too good! In fact, when you die, I’m going to remarry!"

He then asked the second wife, "I have always turned to you for help and you’ve always been there for me. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?" "I’m sorry, I can’t help you out this time!" she replied. "At the very most, I can help with your funeral."

Then a voice called out to the king in his sadness: "I’ll leave with you and follow you no matter where you go." The king looked up and there was his first wife. She was so skinny and undernourished. Greatly grieved, the king said, "I should have taken much better care of you when I had the chance!"

Truthfully, we all are the King and we all have four wives in our lives.

Our fourth wife represents our body. We love our body. We make our body look nice to the outside world every day. We wash it; we put clothes and shoes on. We give it food and we try to protect it. No matter how much time and effort we lavish in making it look good, it’ll leave us when we die. It cannot follow us.

Our third wife represents the material things that we have in this life: possessions, status and wealth. We work hard for the job and status we have, the money we have earned, and the possessions that we own. Often, we are very attached to these things and are afraid to lose them. However, when we die, we are forced to let them go. We come into this world empty-handed and we leave this world that way also. So, after our death, our possessions will be divided up and given to others.

Our second wife represents our family, friends, and the society that we live in. No matter how much they have supported and loved us, the furthest they can stay by us is up to the funeral. They are saddened by our death, yet there is nothing they can do but have tears of grief.

Our first wife represents our soul, often neglected in pursuit of wealth, power and pleasures of the ego. However, our soul is the only thing that will follow us wherever we go. Perhaps it is beneficial to cultivate and strengthen our soul now rather than to wait until we're on our deathbed to lament.

Moral of the Story

Take care of your body and keep it healthy so you can live life to its fullest. Enjoy your possessions, the pleasure and the comfort they provide. Cherish your friends and family and the love they provide. Yet, don’t forget to nourish your soul. Consider:

• Taking a walk in nature.
• Playing! Experience the world around you as the playground that it really is!
• Praying and/or meditating.
• Not worrying.
• Smiling!
• Dancing!
• Being loving!

Take time to be alone, to pray, to meditate, for it is the source of all your life and will prove to be your most faithful friend.

The time to love your "First Wife"...is now.

"Every moment and every event of every man’s life on earth plants something in his soul." - Thomas Merton

"Take care of your body as if you were going to live forever, and take care of your soul as if you were going to die tomorrow." - Saint Augustine

Renee Lehman is a licensed acupuncturist and physical therapist with 30 years of health care experience. Her office is located at 249B York Street in Gettysburg. She can be reached at 717-752-5728.