AI vs Human - You decide

Dolores Hans
MSMU class of 2025

(4/2024) What is it like to be in a big family?

Chat GPT’s Response

Growing up in a big family is akin to living in a bustling community within the confines of one's home. With siblings aplenty and relatives always around the corner, there's never a dull moment. From the early morning chaos of getting ready for school to the late-night conversations echoing through the halls, the energy of a big family is palpable and invigorating.

One of the most remarkable aspects of being part of a large family is the constant companionship it provides. Whether it's playing games, sharing meals, or simply lounging around, there's always someone to share the moment with. This abundance of company fosters a deep sense of camaraderie and support, creating lifelong bonds that withstand the test of time.

However, living in close quarters with so many personalities inevitably leads to its fair share of conflicts and disagreements. From petty squabbles over trivial matters to more serious disputes, navigating the dynamics of a big family requires patience, compromise, and a healthy dose of humor. Yet, it is precisely these challenges that contribute to personal growth and resilience, teaching valuable lessons about communication, empathy, and conflict resolution.

Despite the occasional chaos and commotion, being in a big family is a source of warmth, love, and belonging. Shared traditions, inside jokes, and cherished memories weave a tapestry of shared experiences that form the foundation of familial identity. Whether it's celebrating holidays, milestones, or simply the everyday moments of life, the presence of a big family transforms the ordinary into the extraordinary, creating a lifetime of cherished moments and treasured relationships.

Dolores’ Response

I am one of eight kids. I am the third oldest child, but the oldest daughter. I have two older brothers, four younger brothers, and a younger sister who is eight years old. The ages of us siblings range from twenty-three to six and a half. Being a part of a big family is something I have always been proud to say, mostly because it is something a lot of people can’t begin to imagine for themselves, and usually because when I follow it up with "I have six brothers," I get a lot of sympathy. I loved it when my family could make up a whole soccer team, or when we would take up an entire pew at church (sometimes two depending on the size of the pew). I loved having big Thanksgivings and barbecues, and all of us piling into a fifteen-passenger van to go on trips. But the older I get, the more aware I become of just how hard it can be to be a part of a big family. My siblings and I are all getting along well now that most of us are older, and we live more separate lives from one another, but when we were kids, there was times when my mom would worry that we would never talk to each other after we moved out. We fought so much. At times I hated my brothers.

There are a lot of scars within me from my childhood that may not have been there if there weren’t so many of us. Now as an adult, I worry about money, insurance, taxes, credit, and all the things that would scare me away from having too many kids myself, out of fear that they would struggle. However, I have also taken on a big role of responsibility in my family, and I am grateful for it every day. The experience I have in caring for babies and children is something I will never regret. One of the greatest joys of my life is the opportunities I was given to be a sister and sort-of-mother to my siblings. I would do anything for them. Because of my big family, I have grown in patience, understanding, generosity, and responsibility from a very young age. I would want my kids to know what its like to take care of a baby, or to go shopping for the family because I simply do not have the time, or have a wonderfully intimidating group of siblings ready to scare off anyone that tried to hurt them. Are the struggles worth the goodness?

There are things about being a part of a big family that even now I struggle with. The three youngest of my siblings are all under the age of ten, and there is a large gap between us. In age, in distance, and in experience. With this, comes a lot of sadness and guilt. When my sister needs hugs from me, or someone to watch princess movies with, or teach her how to handle the drama in her friend group, I’m not there. Right now, I can still go home over breaks, but I am burdened by the knowledge that soon I won’t have opportunities to go home to her as often as I wish I could. When my brother needs someone to understand him and defend him, and make him feel special, I can’t be there.

I still haven’t processed seeing my family dynamic changed so much now that half of us are moved out and my parents aren’t burdened by us financially. I find myself jealous of my six-year-old brother because he gets fun snacks for school and to grow up in a house with a working septic system and the ability to get dental work done because now, we can afford insurance. But I know that they struggle too. I can’t imagine what it is like when you’re just a child and half your siblings are not living at home and are beginning their own families far away. My sister had to go to the ER recently and has been in a lot of pain, and I simply cannot stand that I am not by her side, holding her hand and kissing her and telling her it’s going to be okay. These are struggles that I have yet to cope with, but at the end of the day I am grateful to have so many people to love.