New Year, New Me

Angela Guiao
MSMU Class of 2021

(1/2019) Wow. Another year has passed, and another year is rolling in. And that means a whole new year of new experiences, new people, and new memories. It also means a new year of resolutions: New Year’s resolutions. And, boy, do we know how those end up.

New Year’s resolutions have the infamous reputation of never really working out. Whether the resolution be to lose x amount of weight, to eat healthier, or even to say "I love you" more, they just never seem to go the way we hope.

Of course, in the beginning of the year, we are hopeful. We are determined. We are rejuvenated. We want to change. We want to become a better version of ourselves. And that is great. That is wonderful. But the reality is, sometimes, even most of the time, we are unable to completely fulfill our goals.

So, what is my New Year’s resolution? I know I might be sounding like a Scrooge right about now with all my doubts and grinch-iness. But please don’t get me wrong; I am not saying every single New Year’s resolution has turned out to be a failure. A great number are successful. And I’m pretty sure that if you put your mind to it hard enough, you’d be able to succeed at whatever you resolve to do as well.

This year, my New Year’s resolution is to be grateful. Year after year, I always wanted to make myself better in many different ways. I am constantly searching for ways to improve my appearance, my work ethic, my life. It has gotten to the point where I realized that in my search to do better, to be better, and to live better, I’ve forgotten what I’ve already achieved in the past; what I already had.

As a perfectionist, I need to accept that, alike everyone else in the world, I am definitely not perfect. I need to accept that my failure to reach my own expectations does not make me worthless. I can change the way I look, the way I feel, and the way I act, but I don’t think that it will make me feel any better about myself. Why? Because of my intention. Because of my motivation. I don’t want to change my life because it’s a brand-new year. I want to change my life because I want my life to change!

And that is what I am going to do. I’m going to wait. I’m going to learn to appreciate the things I have and be satisfied with the life I have been given. Sure, there are a bunch of things that I would like to instantly change right now. I think change is good. It’s scary and it’s mysterious, but it’s also healthy. But, I also think that as much as we may need change, we also need to take a moment where we acknowledge what we have. We must acknowledge where we are grateful for the reality of our life. We must learn to look for the silver lining, even if it’s not always obvious. By appreciating what we have, we are changing our entire view of the world. And maybe, just maybe, that’s a good enough change for us today.

This past year, I returned to school after taking a year off. I was so happy. I walked around campus appreciating every single step, every chance to enter Patriot, every glance at the trees and the buildings I have grown so accustomed to my first year that I spent at the Mount.

I appreciated school and learning so much more now because that opportunity was taken away from me. I brushed off my friend’s complaints about homework and waking up early, because I was so thankful that I actually had something to complain about. You don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone.

I realized that this feeling and this mindset should not only pertain to school. It should pertain to my whole life, to my entire family, to each of my decisions, and to all of my thoughts. I could not live a life based on negativity. I could not live always expecting the worse to happen or imagining the worst-case scenario. I couldn’t go through life taking everything for granted!

As I’ve already experienced, you could wake up one day and everything that you thought you had, every privilege that you didn’t appreciate, could disappear suddenly. I don’t want to wake up one morning and realize that I didn’t appreciate my life enough; that I didn’t appreciate my parents, my friends. I don’t want to wake up and realize I wasted my entire life dreaming of what I could’ve have instead of enjoying everything I already did have.

So, that is why this year my New Year’s resolution is to be grateful. Actually, I take that back. My life resolution is to be grateful because I want to remember to be grateful every single day. I want to appreciate and acknowledge people and things that happen to me. I want to enjoy life. Overall, I want to be happy.

I don’t have a problem with chasing dreams. It’s one of my favorite pastimes. But the luxury of chasing dreams is only there with the acknowledgment of our own realities. Dreams are supposed to be a better reality. But how can we chase something better if we don’t recognize all the amazing things that we already have?

This is a reminder to be happy. It’s a reminder to kiss your mom or your husband or your children every chance you get. This is a reminder to thank God for waking up every morning to live another day and to thank Him for putting you to sleep every single night. It is a reminder that every opportunity is just that: an opportunity. And that not everyone is as blessed as we are to have a choice.

Read other articles by Angela Tongohan