5 Ways Psychotherapy Can
 Save Your Marriage

(4/25) If you're considering divorce but aren't entirely sure if it's the route you want to go, or you're simply struggling immensely in your marriage and want to fix things, you're not out of luck. Fortunately, marriage counseling and psychotherapy have saved many marriages and can save yours.

Before you consider marriage therapy, both you and your spouse should at least be willing to fix things and look within to see what might be going on. If one or both of you goes in feeling angry or wanting to attack your partner or argue "your side," you're likely not going to be able to make growth.

Here are five ways that psychotherapy can save your marriage if you're ready.

It Can Help Your Learn About Your Partner's Past

One of the best ways to learn to be empathetic for each other in a relationship is by seeing the other person's point of view. You'll likely learn together why you have developed a certain attachment style or pattern of behavior in a relationship due to your childhood and any trauma you may have experienced.

Being able to open up and be vulnerable about your past with your partner in a safe environment is the first step to being able to feel empathetic for each other and understand each other better. When you know that someone is acting out of fear due to how they were treated as a child, it's much easier to hear them out and speak to them kindly.

You Have a Third-Party to Help See Things From a Subjective Point of View

The worst part about arguments in a marriage is that you don't have someone who is calm and level-headed to tell you when you're being ridiculous or doing something wrong. In fact, your poor behavior fuels the other person, and neither of you feels that you should be the one to stop the fight because you may feel that you shouldn't make an effort if they won't.

The therapist can help you both learn to make efforts and can even tell one of you when you're the person acting incorrectly or hurting your partner. You do have to be open to criticism, and you do have to be open to changing your ways, even if your partner isn't. It's important to remember that you can't fix a marriage by yourself, but you can make a change in your patterns.

You Will Learn New Coping Skills for Your Relationship

Your couples' therapist will help you and your partner learn new coping skills to use during or after arguments. These skills can help you retrain your thought patterns and behaviors and start to practice more healthy forms of disagreement.

You may feel silly or vulnerable at first, but with time, you'll learn that communicating openly is possible, and it doesn't need to hurt!

You Can Avoid Divorce and Custody Battles

One of the main benefits of going to therapy over getting a divorce or breaking up is the avoidance of divorce and custody battles over children or items. In some cases, divorce is necessary, but for those who do love each other and have a desire to become closer again, therapy is an extremely valuable resource to try.

You May Grow and Become Closer

Therapy can even help you grow and become closer as a couple. You may learn more about each other that you wouldn't have spoken about if you were at home alone without the help. You may also have a new respect for each other as you see your relationship as a problem that needs to be fixed together and not something that one of you caused.

Conclusion